


You Are My Sunshine

by GabrielsGumdropGirl (Sammys_Sunshine)



Category: Marvel, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Avenger reader - Freeform, Death, F/M, I'm Sorry, Lots of Angst, Sickness, Sister Barton reader, So much angst, Some Fluff, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-02
Updated: 2018-12-02
Packaged: 2019-09-05 10:32:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16808920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sammys_Sunshine/pseuds/GabrielsGumdropGirl
Summary: Я пропустил тебя, солнце= I have missed you, sunshine





	You Are My Sunshine

_**You are my sunshine... my only sunshine...** _

You're an _Avenger_. You're a _Barton_. You don't get _colds_. But, here you are laying in your bed with a glare on your face, the sniffles, and tissues surrounding you like snotty snowballs. All. Alone.

  
 _Why_ were you in your room by yourself? Because you're pouting like a child instead of accepting it like an Avenger. Your team put you in a time out because you couldn't focus on aiming your bow while trying not to cough or sneeze. Steve was going to take pity on you and Bruce was going to create something you could use on missions but it was Tony's overall decision that had you grounded in the tower. Even Pepper couldn't sway him with her care package for the cold.

  
"Sorry, sunshine. Once you can talk without sounding like you're trying to do it through your nose, you can come back."

  
So, you growled at Iron Man and pleaded with the others for help with your best puppy dog eyes but sadly, they couldn't do anything. What Tony said goes and like Hell were you going to go over him to Fury. You didn't have a death wish or a kink for public humiliation. With your fate sealed, you stomped over to the elevator, completely ignore your brother, who tries to console you and go straight to your room. Do not pass Go. Do not collect 200$.

  
Someone knocking on your door pulls you from your pity party and Clint's blond head pops in after you yell 'it's open!' He closes it behind him and it's tempting to toss the tissues at him. He sees your fingers twitch and narrows his eyes.

  
"Want to be on Loki duty?"

  
Of course, the one person you tried hiding your crush on the demi-god from was the first to catch on. He didn't approve but knew better than to get in your way. Not that said Trickster even knew who you were anyway.

  
"You wouldn't."

"I would."

  
You stick your tongue out at him and attempt to refocus on your drawing. Or doodling, rather since it was a bunch of flowers patterned in the shape of long, curved horns. Clint flops down next to you after disposing of the tissues on his side and peers down at your artwork.

  
"I'm sure we can convince Thor to find the helmet so you can do that. I bet Tony would _pay_ for you to do it."

  
"No."

  
"Come on, sis. You know it'd be funny."

  
Clint said it in such a high pitched, sing-songy way that it had you laughing. And then came the coughing. It racked your body, tore through your throat and felt like your lungs were going to come up. Clint handed you a glass of water, and when taking a sip, a little blood spilled from your lips into the clear liquid. Your older brother's eyes grew wide with fear.

  
"When did that start?"

  
"Just now."

  
He grabs your hand, and pulls you to your feet, dragging you out the door, down the hallway, and to the stairs because he's too impatient for the elevator. Bruce's level is right below yours, so it doesn't take all that long to get to his lab. The quiet man looks up from the stack of papers he was originally staring down at, a questioning look on his face.

  
"Did Tony release you?"

  
"No," Clint answers for you. "I brought her here. She's coughing up blood."

  
Bruce's deep brown eyes widen in alarm. He gently takes you by the arm and leads you to one of the hospital room setups Tony designed for reasons similar to this and has you climb up on the bed. He takes your blood pressure and checks all your vitals while Clint hovers around behind you, pacing like a mother hen. It's not until he checks your breathing that things seem to change for the worst.

  
One deep breath in and then you're coughing again, little droplets of blood splattering in the crook of your elbow.

  
"What's wrong with her?"

  
Bruce doesn't answer Clint, only shakes his head and then walks out of the room, closing the door behind him. The door opens again, and Bruce pops his head in. "Stay in here. I need to talk to Tony."

  
"Tony!"

  
Bruce has to holler over the sound of AC/DC for the genius to hear him.

  
"What?"

  
"It's (Y/n)."

  
"What's wrong with sunshine?"

  
Bruce's face falls, and Tony knows whatever his science bro is about to say isn't good.

  
"(Y/n) has tuberculosis. I have to do bloodwork to be one hundred percent sure but listening to her breathe and... and her coughing up blood. There's nothing we can do for her but and this is a huge _but_ , what if we have her healed?"

  
The cogs in Tony's brain whir until it sinks in what Bruce is suggesting.

  
"No. Absolutely not."

  
"He might be able to heal her! Tony, it'll kill Clint if we lose her."

  
"How bad is it?"

  
"It's progressing incredibly fast. Antibiotics aren't even going to slow it down. He is a last resort request."

  
"Fine. Get Thor."

  
You had dozed off against your brother's shoulder waiting for Bruce to come back. Whatever was happening to you was weakening you quickly. The door opens, and half the team plus an extra walk in. Clint glances from Bruce to Tony to Thor before his eyes finally land on Loki.

  
"What's he doing here? What aren't you telling me?"

  
Thor guides Loki forward, giving him a look that says to behave.

  
Your golden hair shines in the bright lighting of the room, laying on Clint and on the pillow behind you. Loki had heard your nickname spoken quite frequently when he chose to listen in on conversations, and now he understood why you were called that. He almost smiled.

  
Loki stretches a hand out, wary of the others in the room but none attempt to stop him. He lays his hand on your forehead, closing his eyes and immediately feels the sickness taking your body. His healing was a feeble attempt, but it made a small dent. It surprisingly took a lot of out of him, but the coughing at least should be stopped now. He staggers back a little and silently walks out with Thor.

  
"What the hell was that about?" Tony asks, his eyes still trained on the door that the demi-gods just walked out of.

  
"Why did you let him in here?!" Clint shouts. "What's wrong with her?!"

  
You cough, hard enough to wake yourself up and glance over at your brother.

  
"What's your deal, Hawk?"

  
Clint immediately rises from his chair and crushes you against the bed.

  
"You scared the shit out of me, kid."

  
"I'm sick, you moron. That's it. But, I feel a little better." A flicker of rage shows in Clint's eyes, and it only makes you more curious. "What aren't any of you telling me?"

  
Bruce stutters something before making a hasty retreat out of the room and all Tony does is give a nonchalant shrug.

  
"This is between you and him, sunshine. Get better so we can get you back out there. Your bro is getting lazy without you competing with him constantly."

  
The need for sleep was taking over your brain, and you yawn while waving Tony's way. "I'll be back before you know it."

  
Clint scoots down into the bed, tucking you underneath his arm and flicking on the tv.

  
"Clint?" you ask, fighting off drowsiness.

  
"Hmm?"

  
"You haven't answered my question."

  
The tv clicks off, and Clint drags a hand down his face, seemingly aging several years.

  
"Loki was in here."

  
You were too stunned to say anything; your mind going a million miles an hour about _why_ Loki was in the room with you.

  
_Was I drooling? Snoring? Oh, God. Did I fart while sleeping? What's wrong with me?_

  
Clint was torn between laughing and being completely concerned about the wildness in your eyes. So, he chokes down the laughter and puts his 'big brother' face on.  
"You're a lot sicker than we thought, kid. Bruce doesn't have any antibiotics or a vaccine to fight the... cold. So, we brought Loki in."

  
_Fantastic. The first time he touches me and I'm unconscious._

  
"He healed me?"

  
"As best as he could. Your... cold is different. But, we'll keep trying until you're back on your feet."

  
Satisfied with his answer, you tuck yourself underneath the covers and promptly pass out.

  
A week passes and your situation only gets worse. Clint gets desperate while Bruce is trying to come up with a vaccine, and Loki is brought back. But this time, you're awake.   
Coughs rack through your body and more blood comes out of your mouth, even when you try to hide it from your brother. The pain in his eyes has you wincing more than the scratchiness of your throat, making you wish for the vaccine. Not to ease your pain, but Clint's. Seeing him upset hurt you more than the sickness did.

  
The door handle moves and you expect to see Tony, Steve or Natasha not Thor and then Loki. The Asgardians have to duck to come into the room and you'd laugh if you hadn't forgotten how to breathe. Clint feels you tense next to him, interpreting it as a fearful reaction at first, but then rolls his eyes when he notices the pink tinging your cheeks.

Loki's sleek ebony eyebrow quirks ever so slightly when his piercing green eyes land on yours but otherwise makes no outward comment.

  
"Sit," Thor grunts, nodding politely your way before guiding Loki to the chair sitting to the right of your bed. "Behave."

  
It's evident he wants to reply with something snarky, but a defeated sigh escapes him instead. He turns your way, raising his brow expectantly.

  
"Well?"

  
The sudden sound of his voice makes you jump and immediately you feel stupid. It's not like you've never heard him talk before. Well, actually, come to think about it... it is. The only ever time you've ever heard anything else come from him has been when he's shouted at Thor or one of the others. With an indignant huff, Loki rises from the chair and promptly sits down next to you.

  
Thor and Clint move like they're going to remove Loki but a tiny shake of your head calms them down.

  
"I cannot concentrate on healing her if the two of you are breathing down my neck." Neither of them moves. "Do you think me that much of a monster to harm her while we are alone? If so, why have me heal her?"

  
After a few tense moments, they give in. Clint leans over and kisses the top of your head, growling out, "we'll be right outside". It was a threat to Loki, but a promise for you. Nothing is said until the door clicks shut behind them.

  
"Do you fear me that much?"

  
You'd been avoiding looking at Loki but his unexpected question forces you to meet his eyes.

  
"I don't fear you at all."

  
"Hmm. May I?" He shifts, turning his torso in your direction and raising his right hand.

  
"Uh, yeah."

  
"Lie back. Please."

  
Looking everywhere but at his face, you lay back against the pillows and jump when his hand touches your chest, even though you were expecting it. His hands are so wide, and fingers so long that they almost span across the entire width of your collarbones when he splays his fingers out. The pressure of his magic bloomed inside your chest, weaving its way through your body; you can feel it running rampantly through your veins, making your heart pump wildly. Loki's brows were furrowed, and his eyes scrunched together in tense concentration. It was getting easier to breathe the longer that Loki's hand stayed; you close your eyes and place your hand on Loki's. His magic falters, and his eyes open but when he sees how peaceful you look, he continues. It's not until you're asleep that Loki allows himself to smile.

  
Not that that lasts long because mere moments after, Clint returns. Immediately, his glare is pinpointed on Loki's hand but softens at the sight of yours on top.

  
"Is it working?"

  
"Yes."

  
"Is it gone?"

  
"No." Clint's jaw ticks with irritation. "This is not an easy fix, Clinton. The sickness that has taken her body is nothing like even I have felt before. You cannot expect it to be healed immediately." Loki recognizes the brotherly affection in Clint's expression; he's seen it many times with Thor. "I will do this for _her_ so she may return to the job she loves so much as many times as needed."

  
"Why do _you_ care?"

  
Cold rage builds in Loki's chest, threatening to spill out and wrap his hand around Clint's neck in retaliation.

  
"I _care_ because _she_ is the only mortal who has no treated me as a monster. _Despite_ knowing of my actions from the past. No harm will come to her while she's in my presence. You have my word."

  
Clint visibly relaxes and sinks into the chair on the left side of your bed. He rubs his face with both of his hands, and blinks a few times, showing just how stressful this has been for him. He seems to age ten years in the few moments he lets his mask down, but once it's back up, it's clear to see the Avenger staring back.

  
"I'll talk to Tony about letting up on your security. And I should be the _last_ person doing so."

  
Loki nods his thanks, carefully removes his hand from beneath yours and exits the room, but not before looking back at your sleeping form and smiling to himself.

_**You make me happy, when skies are gray...** _

The next morning, you were allowed to be moved back into your room. You were _ecstatic_ and felt amazing. Bruce checked your vitals before releasing you, and with a hug and a kiss on his cheek, you were walking arm in arm with your brother.

  
"Tony wants to have a family dinner tonight now that you've been checked out. You up for it?"

  
"Hell yeah."

  
"Loki's coming too."

  
You damn near fall on your face going into the elevator and Clint laughs.

  
"Good to see that you're still somewhat normal."

  
"You're an ass."

  
Clint continues laughing on the ride up to your floor, and then some more until you shut your bedroom door in his face. It's only a dinner party so there's no need for anything fancy, but the need to dress up for Loki is running rampant through your mind. Something from your own wardrobe will have to do because you're nowhere near Natasha's slim size, and wouldn't dare to wear anything she has anyway. Her choices are bold and confident, and most of the time you feel like a dressy potato. Being seriously sick has made your curves show a slight bit more, and you wonder if you should even bother with dressing up. Loki's only noticed you because Clint needed him to help you. Sighing, you sit down on your bed and glare a hole in your dresser. Worth a shot though, right?

  
With a groaned mumble, you drop to your knees in front of the drawers and begin searching for something presentable to wear to the dinner in honor of your recovery. When nothing suitable is calling out to you from the dresser, you go to the closet and slide the doors open and immediately your eyes go straight to the little black dress you'd been saving for a good time. You pull it out and look it over for wrinkles. Finding none, you approve.

  
"Now's a good a time as any to wear you, huh?"

  
It's modest, comes to mid-thigh and will show a slight amount of cleavage but not enough to send your brother into the infirmary ward next. You lay it on the bed, pick out your favorite bra and panty set to go with it and then head to the shower. Carefully shaving everything until it's smooth and taking the time to actually put on makeup, you hardly recognize yourself in the mirror. And the dress isn't even on yet.

  
Clint knocks on your door as you slip on your flats and you yell for him to come in. Your hair is in an updo with your bangs curled and hanging to frame your face, and a pair of gold earrings decorate your ears. You stand up and face your brother and are met with narrowed blue eyes.

  
"What?"

  
"I'm going to kill him the moment he looks at you."

  
"I'm not dressing up for him. I'm doing this for myself because I'm no longer bedridden."

  
Clint's resting bitch face tells you he doesn't believe anything you just said. You smirk, and loop your hand through his arm and drag him out of your room. He keeps muttering something under his breath, but a pinch on the inside of his elbow shuts him up. All confidence whooshes out of you the moment the doors onto the lounge floor open up and you have the sudden urge to duck back into the elevator and go to your room. Clint gives you a smirk and pulls on you, which results in you making an embarrassing squeaking noise that attracts _everyone's_ attention from the couches. One by one, you meet their eyes; Tony, Bruce, Natasha, Steve, Thor and finally, Loki. You receive nothing but appreciating looks but it's when you see the teasing curl of Loki's upper lip that you feel your face heat up.

  
The ding of the oven goes off, and the team all gets up to come to greet you and Clint while Bruce pulls the meal out. Instantly the smell of lasagna hits you, making you absolutely ravenous. Steve and Thor crush you in brotherly hugs, and Tony kisses your forehead.

  
"You'll be back on the team soon, sunshine."

  
"I hope so."

  
Natasha approaches you and holds her arms out, to which you willingly go into. She holds on, and rubs your back, humming lowly in her throat.

  
"Я пропустил тебя, солнце."

  
It's the only phrase she's ever said specifically to you, so you know it well. It's been long debated about who started calling you sunshine first, with Tony thinking he did and Natasha claiming she did because she's known you longer but you honestly couldn't remember anymore. She and Clint made a small barrier between you and the final member that had yet to approach you, and something said that they weren't going to let him get any closer.

  
Bruce clearing his throat had everyone heading to the table, and once more you were put between Clint and Natasha, with Loki at the farthest part of the table from you. Salad, bread, lasagna and bottles of alcohol are passed around until everyone has something and then Tony holds a short glass full of whiskey up in a toast.

  
"To our Sunshine: may you keep recovering so you can join us out in the field again and kick your brother's ass. To Sunshine!"

  
Everyone follows in the toast, but it's when Loki murmurs your name lightly enough for you to hear it that a blush covers you from your neck all the way up to your face. If he knew how you felt, was he responding or mocking?

  
Laughter and drinks overflow all night and you watch with amusement as Clint, Thor and Tony get considerably drunk the longer the dinner goes on. You hang back with Steve, Natasha, and Bruce, all taking sips from your drinks. But, even you can't resist the pull of the alcohol and begin drinking more. You've survived a nasty sickness that required Loki to heal you for, so what the hell! Beer pong, shots, bring it on!

  
Loki watches you loosen up, curious if the alcohol would give you enough courage to approach him. He didn't know your true feelings, assuming that you feared him instead of quite the opposite. You would send him looks from across the room, seemingly taunting him to do something. He admired the way your dress complimented your luscious curves, and he wondered what they would feel like under his hands.

  
Tony put on music, and immediately the first one that plays is a slow one. You're clear-headed enough to want to bail, but a tall figure steps in your way at the last second. A long, slender hand is held out to you, and you bashfully look up at Loki through your eyelashes.

  
"Join me for a dance?"

  
The whole room seemed to hold it's breath as Loki waits for your answer. Clint shifts where he stands but Natasha's hand on his arm stops him from putting an end to the interaction. With a deep breath, you slip your hand inside Loki's, instantly noticing the coolness of his touch. He rests his other hand on your waist, and in your own little bubble, the two of you begin dancing.

  
He's such a beautiful man that it makes your heart ache, and the rest of the room is quickly forgotten as you stare up at him. Loki gently sways with you, his gaze never wavering and a small smile cracks his lips as you let out a giggle when one of your bangs moves to the front of your face. He raises a hand and brushes it out of the way, tucking the strand behind your ear. It feels like you've been dancing for hours with Loki, but it's only been minutes and your peace is rudely interrupted by a suddenly loud song. Reality crashes down on you so quickly that it's sobering and you can't stand to be in the same room as anyone else anymore. Whispering Loki good night, you leave him and head straight for the elevator, not once turning around. You can feel his and everyone else's eyes burning into your back but you refuse to give in to the pressure. Nothing really has been done, but you feel humiliated. Did Loki take advantage of your intoxication by asking you to dance with him? Or did you let your guard down enough to finally give into how you feel? The doors ding open, saving you and thankfully close quickly.

  
"What the hell was that about?" Tony slurs, leaning on Bruce. "Reindeer games, what'd you do?"

  
"I am as puzzled as you are, Stark. I would never harm her."

  
Clint glares at Loki as he strolls by, silently promising a world of hurt if he did hurt his sister.

  
Stripping out of your dress and everything that went with it made you a little sad, but at least it removed some of the weighted thoughts you were having because of your actions from tonight. Off with the makeup and jewelry and on with your favorite set of flannel pajamas. You pull out your secret stash of ice cream from the mini-fridge next to your bed and click onto Netflix before burrowing down in your thick blankets. Somehow, you knew it'd only be a matter of time before you were interrupted, and as you predicted, it was your brother that came barging into your room.

  
"What the hell happened up there?" You shrug. "No. You don't get to bail on me about this one, sis." He plops down next to you and takes your ice cream despite your indignant cry of outrage. "Tell me or I'm going to eat it all." He lifts the spoon to his mouth, comically wide open as he's about to insert the utensil.

  
"All right! I humiliated myself by accepting Loki's offer to dance. I completely let my guard down and not just in front of him, but in front of _everyone_."

  
He returns your ice cream to you after taking a bite and leans against the headboard.

  
"I told you nothing good would come of your crush."

  
"It's not like he knows anyway!"

  
"He might. Why else do you think he asked you to dance?"

  
"Because I've been drinking? Because he's been healing me? It's Loki. I'm a mortal, a _Midgardian_. Not whatever he is."

  
Knowing that the conversation isn't going to get any better, Clint gives you a one-armed hug and leaves you to Netflix and ice cream.

  
You try to fight off remembering the way your small hand fit inside Loki's and how his hand seemed to feel perfect on your waist, but the dance keeps replaying over and over again in your head. It becomes impossible to focus on the movie, so you put your ice cream back and tuck yourself into the blankets until only the top of your head can be seen. Thinking about Loki's brilliant green eyes and the way they would light up when he truly smiled occupied your thoughts until you doze off.

  
_Meanwhile, elsewhere in the tower, Bruce finally has a breakthrough with the vaccine. In a few hours, it'll be ready to give to you._

  
In the middle of the night, you have an unexpected visitor. Loki hovers at the foot of your bed, debating on waking you up for another dance or merely sitting next to you to watch you sleep for a few moments. Having you in his arms again has plagued his thoughts all night, but after you ran away, he wonders if he had done something wrong.

  
"Did I offend you in some way, little one? Or are you still trying to hide your affections?"

  
He can't see your face, which means he can't see your eyes as they widen in surprise. You quickly close them when you hear his footsteps get closer, and pray you look like you've been asleep the whole time when he reaches the head of the bed. Loki pulls the covers from your face, stroking your cheek with the backs of his fingers before leaning down and kissing your temple.

  
"I will let you come to me, my sweet. But, do not take too long. For I might not have the patience to wait before I come to you again."

  
He leaves, with a whisper of wind brushing over you and giddily, you run your fingertips over the spot his lips had touched your skin. You fell asleep with a smile on your face and your fingers in the same spot a few minutes later.

  
_**You'll never know dear, how much I love you** _

  
"Get up!" Clint hollers, waking you before the sun has even risen. "Bruce has something to tell you! Come on!"

  
For being the older sibling, he was quite immature for the way he handled somethings. For example, jumping on your bed like a damn monkey. He yanks a pillow away from you and starts beating you with it until you swipe his legs out from under him from under the covers. He lands with a grunt but springs back into action by pummeling you with it again.

  
"All right you overgrown child! I'm up!"

  
Clint drags you out of bed, running with you in the halls and down the stairwell until you reach Bruce's lab. Bruce says nothing at your disheveled state, only holds back a smile behind his hand. While trying to maintain some dignity, you finger comb your hair while waiting for him to begin explaining why you're here so early.

  
"I was able to create the vaccine you need."

  
It feels like a two-ton weight has been lifted off your chest.

  
"Are you serious?" He nods, pushing his glasses up onto his nose. "When can I get it?"

  
"Now, if you want."

  
You nod your head eagerly and follow Bruce into the room you'd been staying in for a while and hop up onto the bed. He takes all your vitals, writes them down and then holds the syringe up that can hopefully cure you the rest of the way. You're tense because of your excitement and have to really concentrate to relax but it's in your skin and out before you can blink. Bruce lets out a chuckle when he puts the bright pink band-aid over the small spot, but hugs you back when you suddenly throw your arms around him.

  
"Thank you."

  
"You're welcome."

  
You release him and sprint out of the room, shouting 'I can join the team again!' loud enough that the whole team should be able to hear you. Leaving Clint behind, you head straight to your room and change into your uniform, ready to start training again. Dizziness clouds your vision but with a shake of your head and the optimism that it's only from all the running, you continue getting ready. But, the moment you slow down, blood begins dripping out of your nose.

  
"Must be a side effect of the vaccine."

  
It takes a few seconds to get it to stop and once it does, you're on your way to the training room. Steve and Thor are already there, being the early birds that they are. Their smiles brighten immediately when they see you.

  
"Sister (Y/n)! It is good to see you join us again!"

  
He crushes you against him, and it must have been laughable when trying to squeeze him back. Steve is much gentler and starts talking you through slow workouts before you can get back to where you were before you got sick. Halfway through, you become dizzy again and blood runs in a stream out of your nose. Steve and Thor panic, with Thor only just managing to catch you before you hit the mats.

  
Bruce is horrified when you're brought back to him, wondering what could have gone so terribly wrong. Your heart rate starts to drop, and your temperature begins to rise. The medical bots Tony has on standby immediately rush into action, assisting Bruce with whatever he needs help with. Blood is drawn, fluids are giving and machines are hooked into you to try and stabilize your body. Your breathing begins slowing, and an oxygen mask has to be placed on your face.

  
"What went wrong?" Bruce asks himself, heartbroken and angry with himself. Green simmers along his skin, but he pushes it down, determined to help you.

  
There's no choice but to have you put in a medically induced coma, so Bruce makes a phone call to have SHIELD's most trusted doctors come to the Tower. Now, it's telling Clint that his sister has taken a turn for the worse that has Bruce worried.

  
Steve and Thor pace outside the room, hoping for good news but are quickly defeated when they see Bruce's crestfallen expression.

  
"Should I get Loki?" Thor asks, trying to keep the sadness out of his voice.

  
"Not sure if it'll help this time."

  
Tony, Natasha, and Clint run down the hall and as Clint goes to get into the room, Steve puts an arm out to stop him.

  
"It isn't good, Barton. Prepare yourself."

  
Clint slowly opens the door, almost dropping to his knees when he sees his little sister hooked up to all the tubes and machinery. Bruce explains that he's called in the doctors and nurses as a last try to see where things went wrong and to try and save your life. His team came in one by one to tell him that they'd be there for him and they'd help take watch so he could sleep. Nothing was going to take him away from your bedside. Not even the need to sleep. There's a bathroom connected to your room, so he never needed to go far either.

  
When the medical team arrived, they asked Clint to leave so they could begin. About an hour later, they exited but it only broke the team's hearts.

  
"You might want to start saying goodbye. It's unlikely that she'll wake. Her organs have already started shutting down. I'm sorry, Agent Barton. We did everything we could."  
Once the doctors and nurses were out of earshot, Clint tells Thor to get Loki. He was desperate and short of selling his soul, he would do anything to get his sister back. Bruce had gathered more chairs for everyone to sit down in, and everyone looked up when Thor and Loki approached.

  
Loki stops in front of Clint, looking sorrowfully into the hospital room.

  
"I cannot promise you anything. I was pushed to my limits last time. But, I will try."

  
He stands solemnly by your bedside, wishing he would've woken you up for another dance. Loki takes your hand in both of his, closes his eyes and concentrates on his seidr, pleading to Valhalla that it'll work. His hands glow a bright green, showing how much effort he was putting into it, but nothing at all was changing in you. He pushes himself harder, feeling the sweat form on his brow and his hands starting to shake. He was terrified of crushing yours between his, but that was nothing compared to the fear he felt of losing you. With a final surge, Loki collapses to his knees but there's no sign of your condition improving.

  
Large hands that can only belong to Thor attempt to lift him up, but he bats them away.

  
"Leave me be," he snarls.

  
"Brother, there is nothing you can do. She's in the gods' hands now."

  
Loki knew it; he could feel your spirit starting to fade as he kept your hand in his. A chair was brought in for him, and he rose from the floor to place himself in it, refusing to meet the gazes of the Avengers. He couldn't bring the words to the surface. He refused to admit defeat. So, Thor did it for him.

  
"I am sorry, Brother Barton. But, not even my brother's magic can save her."

  
A strangled sob chokes Clint's throat, and a tear slips down his cheek. He stoically drags his own chair to the opposite side of the bed that Loki is on, and takes your other hand in his. The rest of the team follows suit, gathering around your bed. It was like a scene out of Snow White but without the elaborate glass coffin and the promise of waking up with true love's kiss.

  
Pepper comes to join Tony, her eyes red-rimmed and face pink from crying. Nick Fury and Maria Hill are next, offering their condolences. The doctors return, announce that there is no brain activity and ask Clint if he wants them to remove the tubes keeping you alive. 'It'll be quick', they reassure him. Nothing was said about the slim possibility that there might be a chance you can wake up. Why offer hope, only to have it crushed? He nods as his heart breaks. Everyone but Fury is openly crying now. And then, the worst sound they've heard fills the room signaling that you were gone. One by one, they press a kiss to your forehead and say their goodbyes until it's only Clint and Loki left. The god of mischief was stony-faced, but Clint could see the pain in his eyes. Finally, Loki couldn't take it anymore and abruptly rose from his chair. Ignoring Clint like he wasn't even there, Loki bent down and held your cooling face in his hands and laid his lips on yours. A single tear dropped onto your cheek and then he was gone. Clint's howl of pain echoes through Bruce's lab and the Avenger sobs into the bed next to you.

  
When it's time to take you away, Clint remains in the room with Natasha to support him. Before they cover your face, Clint notices that your hair still seems to shine, much like the sun after a rainy day.

  
Natasha helps him plan the funeral arrangements, write your obituary and inform the few friends you had outside of your job about your passing. Clint was the only family you had left, and now he's alone. Members of SHIELD, fans of the Avengers and anyone you had had contact with sent in flowers and cards, filling up Clint's floor and even overflowing around the Tower itself.

  
The autopsy revealed that you had been injected with tuberculosis, and it was pinpointed that it had happened at the last battle you had been in with the team. It had been specifically created so if a cure or a vaccine was to be used, that it would kill you almost immediately. The hunt for the Hydra team that had been responsible for it happening began as soon as they were released from the briefing.

  
Clint was never alone coming up to the day of the funeral, but the only one he didn't see was Loki. It was frustratingly confusing to the archer because he felt like Loki should've been present by the obvious affections he had for you if anything was to go by with how he acted the day before you died.

  
The night before the funeral, Clint finally gathered to go into your room. He told himself he didn't pay attention to the blankets still lay where you'd thrown them off, or how your dress hung halfway in and out of your laundry basket. It took him a few minutes to find what he was looking for, tucking the drawing pad underneath his arm to carry it out. Before he leaves the room, he grabs the dress, thinking you would approve of being buried in it. It was the last thing you wore when you were happy as well, easing some of the aches in Clint's heart.

  
He sought out the Asgardian, wanting to feel angry but not able to feel anything but numbness. Clint found him in the library with a large book in his lap. Before he approaches, Clint searches for the right picture and then drops it onto the pages of the open book.

  
"She really did love you. I tried telling her nothing good would come of it but you... you made her happy while she was sick." Loki never looks up from the book, but Clint could tell that he was listening. "I don't know if she ever had any intention of giving that to you, but I thought you'd want to have a piece of her."

  
Loki's upper lip curls up in a small smile as his fingers drift over the detailed flowers that make up the shape of his horned helm. Golden petals and emerald leaves make up the middle of it while an array of rainbow-colored blooms form the outline, all kept perfectly in line with the ebony inked borders.

  
"Thank you," Loki murmurs.

  
Instead of keeping the art locked away, Clint began working on finding the perfect frames to put all of the pieces in so he can hang them on his floor. It keeps him up all night, and only takes a brief nap when he's finished. Natasha has to wake him up, telling him he needs to get in the shower because the funeral is only a few hours away.

  
Nothing could've prepared Clint for the number of people that showed up, nor how many gave speeches about how kindly you had treated them. on your off days, you were volunteering anywhere you could and many of those people came to talk about it. Even Nick Fury stood up to talk about you. But, it's when Loki rises from his seat next to Thor, towering over the attendees and steps up to the podium to talk that it really shows how much you meant to him. He only says four words.

  
"I loved her too."

  
And then a helm identical to the one you drew appears in his hands. He lifts it up to his face and kisses it, before stepping down and setting it on your coffin. It had been a cloudy day all morning, but the moment the flowered helm was laid down, the sun decided to come out. Loki lifts his head and smiles.

  
_**Please don't take my sunshine away.** _

**Author's Note:**

> Я пропустил тебя, солнце= I have missed you, sunshine


End file.
